the wonder of you

hey guys...
actually i dont know what to write today..
but i feel like writing... so what i am going to write...lets see
today i am going to express why i feel positive after so many wrong turns of my life...
i feel positive because i know that this bad time will go eventually and the goods times were on the doorstep again...
i am hearing the taps and beats playing inside my head... and its so sweet that it makes me wanna move.. make me feel alive and happy to myself...
the happiness of life is not in girlfriend and boyfriend or a life partner... these all are just supports that you gonna need in your life so that you will have strength at your weakest moments...
the real happiness in keeping yourself happy by doing all the little, crazy stuffs that you wanna do...
and i promise to you ... you wont regret it...!!
coz that is what your heart really wants.. you really want....!!
its you and all you that make things right... no one is going to come and save you...
its you and the wonder of you upon yourself that is going to save you...
so why wasting your precious time over someone who doesnt worth your efforts...
try to impress yourself and try to keep your inner self happy.. you will find yourself smiling always...
i have tried to keep someone happy... i have tried so hard that i forget to love myself....
i forgot that to keep someone happy  you have to be happy at first place...
its not like i was not happy making his dreams come true.. but in the path of fullfilling his dreams... my pocket of dreams are becoming empty day by day...and finally i realise that his dreams pocket are never gonna be full but mine is gonna be empty soon...
so dont forget about your dreams and your happiness!!!
only a healthy tree can produce sweet fruits!!!

leave the heart broken for sometime

I know the heart ache, the breakups are hard to cope with...
but even you have decided it through the hard way that you wanna move on....
somewhere you wanna stuck there..
and you want him back...
but after all the times I tried to have him back in my life...
all I  got is disappointment...
more heart aches,...
harder heart breaks....
and found myself into pieces of previously broken once...
from feeling every little things to feel not a single thing..
you went back to feel each and every minute things...
and when all the things happens again you realize...
you are numb again...
you want to cut yourself again...
you want to feel your heart beating again...
coz all you can feel is that your heart skiping a beat every time you breathe and
its beating is only enough to keep you alive not for having a life...

so dont keep on checking the sites that teaches you how to have your ex back...
instead always keep in mind why it never worked out in the first place...
And it never gonna be start over...
it always gonna start from the place you had left... the fight and the issues where you left...
you are going to be left alone once again and this time you wont even know the reason...
and may be you have already dreamed of a better life ahead while you are going to be dump again ...
so why making a new scar over the wounded heart...
leave the heart wounded for sometime and let it heal on its own...
dont rush for making and trying to keep things on the right path always...
why not keep the things as it is and dont try to change it...
after all
whatever happens.... happens for a reason...
and there is a good life ahead...
why setting for something that neither you deserve nor you want it...
love yourself..
live will bring the best out of you and for you...!!!!

what is love?

what is love....???
A question everyone ask but no one really understand...
By asking this question... no one really want an theoretical answer but the answer through which one can know how deeply you really understand love..
by explaining what u think love is... you show your maturity level...
I will not say that the explanation i am going to write is the good one and i have achieved the proper maturity of my age.
but somehow i have seen both the side of love..... the one where the attachment is less but affection is more and the one where attachment is more but the affection, commitment and other essential  stuffs are less...
the first one is the kind where you are luby duby... touchy touchy all the time.  but u dont think about each other at the odd times... its all not about thinking of someone... remembering the time spend with them,  mesmerizing the touch, voice... at the free times... but doing all the  above listed things and many more at the times you are actually busy and doing a ton of works...
In the second kind of love.. the luby duby the touches are far different than the first one...
In this one you do not want to leave the other one..we show love in the small stuffs... these kind of stuffs are so casual that you wont even notice ...
these people doesnt have to stick together all the time but they know what the other person wants even by the way the other person behave.. or even simply by their move...
even they have been seperated for a long span of time.. they will behave like they were never been to any kind of separation time... everything is just the same...
but in other first kind of love.. the seperation brings attitude, ego, so called self respect and most important the person whom you used to love is lost and become some non bearable, irritating kind of person for the other one...
The separation time do damage the people and relationship but those who truly admire the other.. know that separation and the damage had just cover the person's heart as a bag.. when you will open the chain you will find the same old loving person beneath the chain...
love is not about keeping the records... its about making the records...of  memories and preserving them...

happy to see you happy

I know  I shouldn't be sad and crying...
seeing your pictures and updates..
where you are with some new peoples whom i never seen before in your life...
To the kind of a person i used to think you are.. how could have so many girls in his life...
I used to think i am the only girl in your life and your friend circle doesnt have any other girl .
eventually i began to realize i was living with a  white lie...
coz when a woman like me is not able to have new friends..so how a man like what you made me to believe.. could have?
I am shattered and broken into so much pieces that even it hurts if someone tries to pick one...
how could you live a life after destroying mine...
how could you have forgotten all the little things that didnt count for you but actually matters..
how could you haven't realize that i was the one who took care of you all these years...
how could you have done with loving me after all i gave you is love and never asked anything like diamonds in the return...

how could you gave my place to so many sluts.. when i am still preserving the pictures of you and me...

how could you just thrown me when all i did is to kept you with all your flaws...
how could you think that i dont want your happiness... when all i ever care is trying not do anything that will hurt you or make you mad...
and yes you accept it or not but I am happy to see you happy.....
with all your new people in your life...
with seeing you  doing all the things you used to say you dont like..
with dating the girl type that you never get attracted to...or atleast dont used to...
or may be its just me
with whom you never wanted to do all the things you are doing right now in your life...
and you seems happy...
so when now i  am living a fake life.. m happy at least you are not doing... the same..
m happy to see you happy and enjoying your life without me...
m happy seeing you happy...and still love you!!!